Sunday, 24 February 2013

Conflicting Mind

This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda

Revolve a story around this line :

‘My heart was saying “Yes” but my head was saying “No”‘


I never understood why there is so much conflict or no coordination between the most beautiful part of my body and the part which makes everything beautiful. By now you might have guessed it that the parts I am talking about is above your waist line. Its the heart and the mind which always fight together and make me confused.

I am still wondering why I said “No”, when my heart was the only one saying the truth. I know the consequences is damn ugly and yet I am revolving around that day when my heart and mind were planning a deep deep conspiracy against me.

It was the day when I decided to propose Ramya and was all equipped, even with the first aid kit. The day started as I planned, waking up late and then struggling to get the bus to school which ends up again being punished in front of whole school. I was way above all these thoughts of being ashamed rather I was just looking for the best time to get it all done.

Ramya, was the most beautiful girl I have ever seen. Well, telling you truly, it was the love at first sight. Her irresistible charm, being brilliant to look upon and listen to, with the power to subjugate everyone, didn't spare me also. She was willowy with long dark lustrous hair. I was in love with this lady for the first time in my life and was just collecting enough energy to tell her that she is the One for me.

The beauty, the color, the voice all make me mad enough to forget everything and completely lost in a distant land without water making me thirsty of her. I was ready to go on with the plan. I called her on the stairs which remained desolated for the first half time of school. I kept practicing in the Romeo pose, bent over, on my knees and saying the golden three words. As the bell rang for the next period, she came running with the envelope in hand and was completely shocked by the awkward position I was in. I managed to get up and regained my posture, when she came close and told me the most disgusting news ever of my life.

She was holding the tickets to South Africa, where her parents are now shifting to. I was in lot of pain but that's what love makes you do “Smile in pain!!”. I was smiling with her laughs. She was leaving in 2 days and I was still clueless how to tell her. After an hour or so, when I collected myself and asked the question which I never wanted to ask “Will you come back ?” and the answer was as expected, “No”. She then justified her point, that they are leaving the town forever, and will settle in SA.

I was completely broken and wanted her to stay, but all went wrong what I planned and there's nothing I could do. In the last period, she came and asked “ Do you want to say something ?” and to my utter foolishness, I bluntly replied “No !!”. I was so disheartened that I could not make any decision and ended up with that reply.

It was the moment when I should obediently listened to my heart and ask her to don't go, but my mind dominated heart's decision, which I still regret. It would have been a very different world with her. Sometimes these gray matter in our brain make us do things which we really regret.

I lost that moment and the time that I could have spent with her. May be that's why people say,

“Patience is what it takes for a normal human being to become extraordinary”.

Thursday, 21 February 2013

Writing to me

This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda

What is writing like? Write a post that includes this phrase, “Writing to me is…”

Writing to me is as if Krishna's(God) advice to Arjuna(People). I write because I love expressing what I feel, what I have been through, what I enjoyed. It gives me the eternal pleasure that needs no words to express. Its good to write, because this 'friend' will never betray me, will never leave me, will always listen to me and will laugh with me on my faults and will always be a clean mirror reflecting ME.

I tried something new. Lets see if all my readers like it.


A discovery was made,
When the sun was set
when life is resting on their softest bed
and winds are soothing the fuming land

I was awake, watching the change
I was searching, the creator of this den
when I found this pen in my hand
and wrote the story of the spirits in hell

I started with love and then with sorrow
I continued to write about the world so hollow
I find many people are in the same pit
where I was lying with the embarassing shits

It sounds so disgusting,
its sounds so lame,
but writing the feelings,
made me to do the same,

You are inquiring the pessimist in me
you are questioning the sleeping tree
I want to answer but I am dumb
and so gave these letters, the power of my words.....!!

Friday, 8 February 2013

Story Untold

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The first time you told a non-family member that wonderful phrase, “I love you.” The lead up, and what happens after that.


We crave for that one beautiful face, which wins our heart, resides in it and remains there forever. It is this feeling, for which we fight with our elders, society and even cry in public. The feeling of being lonely in crowd, when your Someone is not with you. You die everyday without her and live whole life in that moment. That feeling which you never forget is called love and yes I am in love...;)

It was the starting period of school, when my physics teacher Mr.Manish entered into the class and I hurried to grab the first seat. It was that seat from where I can easily get a glimpse of my someone. The clock was ticking and I was looking outside constantly when Mr. Manish hit me with the chalk and interrupted my day dreaming there only. I was again in the classroom and started acting as if nothing happened. Thou I was caught red-handed, then too it was all basic instinct which is a very quick electrical response of our body. Her class was in the building that was just opposite to my classroom's building.

I got the glimpse in the 5th period after lunch, when I waved her “Hi” and she replied back. I asked her, that she had her lunch, and “yes” was the reply and then that stupid bell rang and everyone went inside their class. At the last moment I managed to tell her by signs to come to the bakery shop outside the school, I had some very important information to share, after school.

As the last period bell rang, I almost jumped off my seat and went like a bullet to the bakery shop. I love waiting for her. She came twirling twisting her hair and aksed the reason of this sudden meeting. I left my school bag and open my arms and with the most beautiful 3 words “I love you” I proposed her.

She was stunned with silence with all other people standing at the bakery shop. She manages to escape that day, and th reply came on next day with a hand made greeting card.

“Please ask before doing such thing in public...!!.......and yes I do.....I love you too....!!” 
was the golden reply I received.

That second day of the last month of 2007 made my day and I still remember the restlessness, the curiosity and the joy. After that proposal, my life changed. I become an renowned person in school and my proposal was the hottest topic among all young love birds. Though this didn't end up well, because her parents came to know and our exams were on my head. The topic flew like a virus, and I guess it really infected my and her parents. Finally after the exams, her parents moved to South Africa, and I went to start my college life in Ghaziabad.

I won't say that was the end, but it was the start of my life where I found that being in a distant relationship when you meet, once in a year if the luck favors, you really understand the meaning of the relations, commitment and Yes, the most valuable, your someone and her absence.

Now we broke up and lived our life in the most beautiful way we can. When we meet, we smile and wave “Hi” to each other. I never saw any agitation or anger, but a regret on both of our face that our society is still in the same pit where it was in 90's....and still we say "We are developing......!!".

This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda

Wednesday, 6 February 2013

Strange Guy

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                           You meet a random person and start talking… What happens next?
Early morning, and the singing birds and here is your tea with some crunchy bread. The most amazing part of morning is that it is really fresh. The time is set to the same starting mark and now its our time to start.

Thus, I started with the newspaper in hand and sitting in my garden, watching kids and their mothers, who are always worried about their children. Then a very strange man was walking on the road, talking to himself looking at my house. I was intrigued by his strange behavior and went up to him to inquire. He requested for a glass of water, and then we sat together to answer his vague questions.

This guy was shabbily dressed, very old with his belly shaking like a bowl full of jelly when he laughs and he laughs a lot. His hair is snow-white ans so was its beard. By the appearance you can say, he must be from Himalayas came after a long duration of tapasya.

He started the conversation with my house, its structure, its vastu and then bluntly came to the point with the question “It seems your family suffered a huge loss recently ?”

This question made me stunned with silence and I could not find any possible connection that how he got to know about the loss. This fascinating fact from this strange guy made me to ask more about us, our family and made me even more restless. He continued to tell more about my family, my wife, about the loss of my first child in order to save my wife. It seems by his talks that this guy was with us all the time during the entire event cycle.

I called my wife and children to meet this strange old man who told truth, which was hidden deep inside my heart. I never realized that this truth which I buried will actually prove to be the blessing in disguise and will make me love my family more.

After all this sudden events of disclosure and meetings with this strange guy, I respectfully accompanied him to the gate and gave some money for his journey. At the gate I found two three letters lying on the street in an open envelope. I collected it and came inside. I read the letters, which says my medical insurance bill is still unpaid and it crossed the due date, so bank will be charging 5% interest on it. It was having all the details including the name of my child and its age, his cause of death and so on. Then I came to know that guy whom I assumed to be some prophet, read only these letters which made him know all this hidden stuffs.

It made me realize that the every thing/work we do, we do it for a reason. Thou, this guy came with fake image and succeeded in fooling us, he also made me realize that how important my family is and how bad a loss could be...!!

Life is a risky game, so play safe because sometimes, its not only about you, sometimes its the group of people who care and love , whom you leave behind....!!

take care...;)